unconditional positive regard

” Express empathy for client’s difficulties (feeling inadequate or incompetent) through unconditional positive regard, warm acceptance, and reflective listening.” – taken from The Personality Disorders Treatment Planner by Neal R. Bockian and Arthur E. Jongsma

Hmm, how to phrase my connection to this statement? I’ll try my best I guess.

This is what has been lacking in my life since, well, forever. Can you imagine the damage it has done? If I had to pick one event or thing to pinpoint as the reasoning behind my mental issues, this would probably be it. Not the molestation, not the traumatic fire; this. When you have something you feel is important turned down or ignored, it burns. When you’re an overly emotional child like I was, it burned and left a deep scar. To this day, when this happens to me, I can’t handle it. I freak out and want to hide forever. Acceptance, let alone “warm acceptance”, has never been a part of my life.

What confuses me more is how am I able to be the exact opposite of my mother in this regard? I feel I am one of the most caring and attentive people out there. Maybe I’m not, I don’t know. What do you think?


2 thoughts on “unconditional positive regard

  1. Thank you so much. We have to now give it to each other. Keep writing this stuff that I hope help you and definitely helped me.

    • Thanks for reading. We do need to pass it on to each other. We may not have received it when we needed it but we definitely need to learn to pass it on to everyone else and hope that they too pay it forward. 🙂

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